failure

Is is possible to feel like a failure when there's no grade awarded to the test and there are really only very loose guidelines?
I'm SO over this glucose test bullshit. I'm walking regularly, eating healthy snacks, and well balanced legitimate meals but it doesn't seem to make me feel better if I do have a 'cheat' moment that's reflected in my numbers. I'm supposed to wait 2 hours from the time I start eating a meal before I check my levels. But, what if it's a potluck or a birthday dinner party, where I'm not done eating within 20 minutes? What if I'm snacking/grazing for an hour? Does that affect the outcome of my results?
I feel so defeated that it's bringing me down and no one wants to hear about it anymore. I've been doing this for over a month already and although my numbers are consistently low, I'm so affected by a high score. It's making me feel like I'm failing and now I'm just anticipating the worst for everything.  :(