so i hope it doesn't turn out too long, but i've been struggling lately with myself. call it mid life crisis or whatever but there are moments in my life where i've reflected and, after a depressing moment or two of self loathing, decided that it's within my power to change whatever''s buggin me. i struggle with choosing me over other people sometimes and am trying to remember that it does NOT make me selfish to consider myself and how I'LL feel in the end. I feel guilty when choosing Me over other people sometimes. I was recently asked a significant favor and I'm happy to say that my very first instinct was to help. I think that shows that I'm still a good person even if I feel shitty for not going along with everything other people put in front of me.
I'm happy to be comfortable helping people who need me, even through personal reservations. I know that when it comes down to something important I can be relied upon and help my fellow neighbor...and that is something not many people can say.
I think this summer will be one for the history books and I hope my actions will be remembered fondly by my daughter when she's older.
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